I have turned into a bit of a grump today. It all started when I woke up this morning and realized that I couldn't focus, for whatever reason. For the last 5 days I have woke up, put on shoes and a sweater, grabbed a cup of coffee and boogied my way on out the front door of this cabin to sit on the porch and have my quiet time. This has been a time for me to read, write and, most importantly, talk to God. In all honestly, it has been my favorite part of the trip.
But, not this morning. No, sir. I got up and came outside, sans coffee, and couldn't focus on anything. I couldn't get through any but two pages of my book and writing, well, that just didn't happen. I tried talking to God but my focus was so bad that I probably had the poor guy spinning in circles.
I cant quite put my finger on what my issue is today other than the fact that I have to leave all of this tomorrow. Good reason, right? I have to go back to the hustle and bustle of life and the important things are going to get a smaller piece of the pie I have to offer. Before you decide to try and give me a lecture on time management skills, I know all about them. My problem is that I have too many things I want and need to do that force me to have to spend less quality time on everything in general. So, in turn, my attention to reading and writing and talking to God are just, well, different. Instead of my quiet mornings, I will be rushing to get to work, talking to God on my commute, rather than a picnic table in the woods overlooking a lake. My reading will take place at night, and will usually consist of having only one eye open, comprehending about 60% of what passes through my brain.
I'm not complaining. Really, I am not. I have just truly enjoyed this week and it has opened my eyes to what my world could be like. One day. At a different time than this. I've been reminded of important things that I let slip away on any ordinary day. Life can be much simpler than I tend to make it.
Moving in slow motion to not miss anything, walks and talks with the big guy, the outdoors (including the sounds, the bugs, the whole nine yards), cooking on the grill and campfire,
time with family playing games and watching scary movies in the middle of nowhere (come on, you know it sounds fun... Especially when you are looking up at this while watching.. )
On a side note, I will tell you that we scared ourselves so badly with the movies and the "what ifs" that we had to hang blankets and towels over the windows that didn't have curtains! Sad, I know.
All in all, I think I am going to take away with me the idea that our lives are not set in stone... things do not have to remain the way they are. In fact, forgetting to leave it in God's hands and run throughout the day at a speed that leaves no time for anything is, well, pointless. And meaningless. (thinking Ecclesiastes here.)
Only I can work to change that. And, I guess, even though it'd be nice, I don't have to have a vacation cabin in the woods to do so. I can turn my own home into my own retreat. God will be there. Always.
Until next time... stay blessed, my friends. And, if ya have a quick moment, say a prayer for our safe travels.